Past Love
by yellowflutterfly
Summary: Edward's having 'dreams'and soon everything starts to fall apart. Can someone come along and help put it back together? EdwardOc. My first Fanfic and characters are some what out of Character.
1. Chapter 1

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Hello who ever may be reading this. Just want you to know that this is my first ever fanfic, so please be kind when reviewing but still tell me where I need to improve (writing is not my strongest point but something I like to do.) Also the characters are a bit (more like a lot) out of character. Takes place after _Eclipse_.

Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight

Edward's point of view

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Past Love

Chapter 1: awakening

"God gave us memory so that we might have roses in December." J.M. Barrie

_There she stood. In her thin, white night gown. The gentle breeze blowing her honey brown hair. The moonlight making her pale skin glow. Her violet eyes shimmering, tears ready to fall. Her face giving every emotion away: sadness, anger, and hurt. He just knew it was her fault as to why her heart was shattered in to a million pieces._

_He tried walking towards her but his feet wouldn't move. Those broken eyes put a name in his mouth put his mind was blank. He soon realized he couldn't hear her thoughts._

_Suddenly she began to fade. Desperate to make her stay he called out to her but to his dismay nothing came forth to match the screams in this mind._

As quickly as it had come, it had disappeared. I had been awoken from my beautiful nightmare. Unfortunately by none other then Alice, who was sporting a more then pissed face.

Crossing her arms and narrowing her eyes into a glare she began to speak.

"What the heck Edward, I've been trying to talk to you for the past ten minutes. And what was up with that, spacing out is usually my thing."

She's got a point it's her thing. And since hearing other people's thoughts is mine, I'll just keep my 'dream' to myself.

"Sorry Alice, don't know what came over me. Maybe I'm just hungry." The lie came out smoothly.

"Hmmm….you should go feed today. We don't need you to go all crazy and eat Bella," she gently teased.

Fixing my stare into a glare, I change the subject.

"What did you want Alice?"

"Oh right! I just wanted to tell you that we need to take some more measures for your suit on Friday. " She smiled and left.

As she walkes downstairs to join Jasper in the living room, I hear her frustrated thoughts.

'What in the world was wrong with him? It seemed like he was seeing something horrible. He looked like he would brake to pieces. Why would he lie to me?'

Blocking the rest of her thoughts, I tossed myself onto my bed. I had no need for it but Bella did. I turned to my side and caught the faint sent of her.

_"Edward...Please stop, it hurts. How many times will my heart shatter?" tears roll down her heart shaped face._

_She wraps her arms around herself. As if, to keep her self from breaking. The wind whips around her shoulder length hair around her face._

Pulling myself from my 'dream', I jump back and land on the floor with a loud thud. A sense of fear and guilt begin to fill me.

My family soon files into my room to see what was wrong. Esme was by my side in a heartbeat (if we had one).

"Are you okay Edward?" Esme asked while gently rubbing my back.

"Yeah, I'm fine. I just ... I don't know…"

"What do you mean?" Alice prided.

'Ha! Now you have no choice but to tell the truth! Come on, let me help.' She pleaded in her mind.

"Umm… Well I've been spacing out lately. I guess I'm just worrying about everything."

All the thoughts from my family were jumbled and I couldn't even comprehend one thought. It was making my head throb.

After an awkward silence and giving me strange looks, they left me alone once again.

Knowing that I was causing her pain made me want to do everything in my power to heal her heart. Yet I knew my love of Bella's sent was causing her pain. And what surprises me is that in my heart I know I would never think of Bella again if it would cease her pain.

Deciding that Bella would have to be kept away from my room …and our house; I got up and resumed staring outside from my window seat, losing myself in my own thoughts.

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I hoped you like it. Hopefully with enough encouragement I will continue.


	2. Chapter 2

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Hey people, I decided to update.

Disclaimer: sadly I don't own twilight

Third person point of view

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Past Love

Chapter 2: The damsel in distress

"No one ever told me that grief felt so like fear" C.S.Lewis

She was pacing lid a mad woman in her room. Truth be told, she looked like one too. Her hair in complete chaos, a face with all the evidence of sobbing, and an angry frown placed on her features.

Every few minutes she would stop and run over to her window in hopes that Edward would be outside waiting to be let in. Yet she knew that Edward never waited to be let in and her hopes were in vain.

Finally giving up at three in the morning, she quickly fell asleep.

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I'm so sorry my chapters are short but I write them in a note book before typing them. So I think I have written a lot but it's really not that much. Hope to update soon!


	3. Chapter 3

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Hello peoples. I hope you are enjoying my story so far.

Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight

Alice's point of view

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Past Love

Chapter 3: Sister's other half

"There are secrets in all families" Jane Austin

'Waking up' was probably my favorite time of day. Rosalie and I would spend at least 3-4 hours every morning getting ready. Usually a good portion was spent dressing up and making goofy faces in the mirror.

It's something we do to forget if only for a while.

Rosalie and I shared the love of shopping and make-up (her love less strong then mine). I know that she dislikes Bella but I understand what Rosalie is feeling. Humanity was something that sometimes we wish we had back. Hopefully Bella would love her immortality and not complain or Rose would rub it in her face (I was certain, if I knew my sister).

Having completed getting ready I curled up on my bed. I didn't need it but it gave me comfort at times.

The years with my sister have led our bond to strengthen. I guess it doesn't seem that way.

'Where is Edward? He should be up by now.' Silently getting out of bed I walked down the hall to see his door slightly open. Pushing it completely open, I stepped inside to see Edward curled up on the window seat looking out for something.

Feeling a bit of panic, I rush over to him.

"Edward?" I try waving my hands in front of his face and gently shake him but it doesn't work.

'What's wrong with you?'

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Sort of a cliffhanger I guess. Thanks for reading. Please review!

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	4. Chapter 4

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Yay another update! I hope people keep reading!

Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns _Twilight_

Edward's point of view

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Past Love

Chapter 4: Falling

"Who has not sat before his own heart's curtain? It lifts: and the scenery is falling apart." Rainer Maria Rilke

_Once more I let my self slip without realizing it. I'm at the meadow with the moon high over head illuminating everything. This was the place from my other 'dream'; the meadow were Bella would watch me sparkle in the sun._

_She had to be here….somewhere._

_'Maybe she's on the other side of the meadow.' I decided while making me way over…_

_'Wait, I can walk?' Looking around I realized I was in the middle of the meadow._

_I spot her on the other side, crouching down to better inspect what looked like a rabbit's burrow. Deciding to make my way over, I begin to move. My first step results in the breaking of a twig. The sound was loud enough to be heard by any ears in the clearing due to the silent night._

_With my disturbance in the quiet night she lifts her head and spots me. She quickly turns and runs._

_Without thinking I run after her._

_'How is she faster then me?'_

_There was a good 15ft. distance between us, but it was growing and fast._

_Suddenly the smell of salt water washed over me. We were running towards the cliffs near La Push._

_Something in my head clicked and I gained more speed. Yet it was too late by the time I would reach her…..'No! Run faster. I won't let her fall.'_

_'A little closer!' I thought as I reached out. Just as I caught her hand we went off the cliffs._

_As we began to fall I pulled her close and turned my back towards the sea._

_Just as we landed in the sea, she disappeared from my arms. I began searching frantically._

_'Where is she?!' My thoughts were in complete panic._

My search was stopped as darkness took over.

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Another cliffhanger! Please keep reading.

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	5. Chapter 5

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Another chapter! More OOC peoples in this chapter (mainly throughout the whole story, sorry but it's what I would have wanted them to behave like in the books, and its my story so yay!)

Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns _Twilight_

Edward's point of view

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Past Love

Chapter 5: Realizing

"If you make people think they're thinking, they'll love you; but if you really make them think, they'll hate you." Don Marquis

Letting my sight refocused, I realized I was on my window seat staring outside

'What's wrong with you?' I head in my head. Surprised I turned around to find Alice looking at me with a panicked face.

"Edward!" She cried while wrapping me in a hug. After hugging her back we parted.

"Please tell me what's wrong. You looked like an empty shell. It seemed you would brake any moment."

Taking her hand and giving her a smile, I reassured her.

"Alice don't worry, I've been getting lost in my thoughts that's all."

"Edward are you having second thoughts about your deal with Bella? If so, tell me so I can cancel everything. I'll…I'll take your suite back and cancel the caterer….just get better…"

This completely caught me off guard. Sometimes Alice's thoughts were going at light speed, so it surprises me what thoughts she speaks on.

"I'm sorry for taking over your wedding and…"

Gently shaking Alice by the shoulders got her to shut-up.

"Alice, please calm down. It's not your fault. Don't cancel anything yet." I pleaded while tucking a few of her wild locks behind her ears.

"Don't send the suite back no matter what. I really like it. I just don't understand why the slacks are too big."

"Oh, I just think its fun how humans have to measured constantly because they can either grow smaller or bigger." She finished with a smile.

"So you wanted to pretend that there was a possibility that I would grow...?"

"Exactly!" she chimed

Sometimes I just can't understand her games.

I tuned into her thoughts as they began to slow down and focus on one thing.

'Why is he like this? What's going on in his head that is causing this…this pain?' Her mind working, trying to piece everything together.

Taking her into an embrace I whispered soothing words that did little effect.

'Where is she? Rosalie is getting antsy!' Jasper thought as he came back from the garage.

"Jasper's worried." I whispered while realizing her.

'What do I say?' She asked

"Tell them I don't feel like going out."

'All right, but please don't stay cooped up in your room all day.'

Jasper had just reached my door when Alice opened it

'What has she been doing?'

"Alice come on. Rosalie is waiting." He grabbed her and quickly pulled her away.

'Good-bye Edward! We'll talk later.' I heard Alice giggling as she left the house…

'What in the world were they doing?! I hate it when they don't hurry up!'…and Rosalie's complaints.

Deciding to forget the world; I slipped back to a place I was beginning to love.

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Yay! Once again another chapter. Sorry about the Edward x Alice in there, I couldn't help it

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	6. Chapter 6

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TT please review! It's so sad I have no reviews…. (Happy once more) okay! Moving on. Another one of my OOC chapters (get used to it peoples dead serious face)…Oh and completely wipe _Breaking Dawn_ from your memories when reading…like it never happened… (I should have explained in the first chapter but I sort of forgot….sorry)

Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns _Twilight_

Bella's point of view

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Past Love

Chapter 6: Dread

"Where you used to be, there is a hole in the world, which I find myself constantly walking around in the daytime, and falling into at night. I miss you like hell." Edna St. Vincent Millay

Waking up brought a dread.

Edward had not shown up.

Tears began to spill as I ate my breakfast.

'Has he abandoned me again?'

My logic told me 'no'. He and I had made a deal, I wouldn't be fragile soon.

Yet my heart told me to cry because he was gone and I had been left out with no choice but to turn around.

Telling my self to be quite being stupid, I made my self another bowl of cereal.

I had a feeling that Edward would not show up. I was tempted to go to La Push but Jacob was still 'missing'. Even so no one there would want to see me. They all blamed me for Jacob's unhappiness.

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Poor Bella, well at least she knows that the pack has a dislike for her at this moment. I hope to update later today as well.

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	7. Chapter 7

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I'm so sorry! It took me forever to post this up. I hope to never do that again. Please forgive me for the wait.

Jacob's point of view

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Past Love

Chapter 7: Return and Realization

"The flowers anew, returning seasons bring, but faded beauty has no second spring" Ambrose Phillips 

I knew that I had worried everyone and was glad I was back.

The problem I had now was that everyone was on my case for behaving differently. Yes I was quieter then usual…okay a lot more…but something just became different.

Maybe I was sad from losing Bella…

'…No that's not it….' Maybe my conscious (or what ever was making sense) was right.

Being at home trying to hide from the pack was not an easy thing. So to occupy myself, I went up to our attic to see what treasures I could find.

I kept myself busy by digging and reading through some of the old books up in our attic. I surprisingly found something that I found interesting. It seemed surreal but come on turning into a big dog was not.

I was reading out of boredom but one passage seemed to stick in my head like glue.

'_Passages from the Journal of Peter Williams_

_October 1781_, _Day after new moon_

_A young boy has changed. The elders seem confused at the sight. The spirits had not mentioned danger to them...'_

'_November 1781_,_ 4 moon falls after full moon'_

_'A family has arrived. Being the only one that can understand this strange language is quite difficult I had been taught French by a man that was traveling and had remained with us for about 7 years before returning home. Information is passed through me. The man of the family says he is a fur trapper. He travels with his wife and three daughters. I must reassure the elders that this family means no harm and show no signs of the cold ones.'_

_'The second daughter has shown a liking towards the young boy that turned one new moon ago. He seems to be returning the feelings as well…'_

'_December 1781, Two days after last quarter'_

_'Sensing their daughters enamor, they decided they would not take a risk and let this love continue. They packed this very morning. The man excused his family and asked for pardon for their sudden departure. He tried to explain that his family had to be home by a certain day. Our system of tracking time is quiet different then the French_

'_The young girl had silently sobbed as her father explained the lie to the chief. As the family began to move out, the young girl ran towards the grieving boy. They meet in an embrace and pressed their lips together in what seemed as a final good-bye. She parted and ran back to her moving family.'_

'_I asked the boy if he regretted meeting her and not creating a life together. He replied with a simple no and a smile.'_

'_May 1785, Day after first quarter_

_'A family has arrived once again, a family of three. The young man that changed four years came, in place of the chief, with me to greet them. After some time we recognized the wife and mother as the young girl that had fallen in love with our single shape-shifter. They exchanged a greeting and a quick embrace.'_

'_Her husband had a small frown etched on his features. Sensing her husband's discomfort she quickly explained, with reddening cheeks, that the young man was the reason her family moved from the area. He seemed to be familiar with the story because the frowned disappeared and greeted the shape-shifter with a smile.'_

'_I realized it was a family of three when I saw a small girl clinging to her mother's skirt. The young women gently tugged her child forward and introduced her. I gave her a gentle hello and a smile but the young man did not.'_

'_He seemed hypnotized at the sight of the child. I can not fully describe the look on his face but he seemed as if everything had been given a solution. His eyes seemed to have a new light, a new reason. It dawned upon me that he had imprinted on the child. This had been the reason of his enamor, the strong bond and pull towards the woman, this child to be within her when they first meet.'_

'_After what seemed an eternity, he bent down to the child's level and extended his hand with a gentle smile glued on his face. His lessons in French served him well because he and the child seemed to be in quiet an interesting conversation…'_

_'January 1799, week after full moon'_

'_Many years have gone by and I now am quiet an aged man…'_

'_The young shape-shifter told the small family of our legends and his imprint on their daughter when she turned fourteen. I remember the mother giving a sigh of relief as she realized that her daughter's feelings for the young man would be returned.'_

'_Our shape-shifter thought he would forever more be trapped in his body as it had been when he had only lived eighteen winters. It turned out fate was planed for him and his days of shape-shifting were over as of the last full moon, one week ago, the very day his beloved had turned eighteen. There was no danger but it seemed the spirits had bended the rules.'_

'_Our now aging, retired shape-shifter of eighteen is to wed to his beloved on the following new moon.'_

I stared absent mindedly at the last phrase as I let the story sink in once more.

I could hear my dad's murmurs down stairs about how troublesome me in hiding was as he walked to answer the phone.

Wondering who it would be this time I tuned into the conversation.

"Hey Charlie," My face gained a smile as I heard his aggravated voice.

I guess was sick of making up lies and trying to deal with Charlie because the next thing I heard was:

"Actually I found him home yesterday when I was returning from the Clearwater's"

"Yeah he's fine. He just feels tired."

I began to laugh softly as I heard dad trying to keep Charlie from coming to ask me about my 'disappearance' and if I had been kidnapped. At that moment I was quiet grateful that my dad hadn't broken down until today. That had given me two weeks to avoid the whole Bella problem. Unfortunately the moment I came back I had to face the pack.

"Jake!" I heard my dad call me and from the sound of it he was still standing next to the phone.

I was downstairs in a flash to see what had happened. His face was creased with aggravation and his features had an expression of questioning.

I understood that Charlie had been dead set on coming over the second he knew I was back home. I made up my mind quickly.

"I'm going to go see Seth; I'll be back around eightish and I'll sneak in through my window, so just check on me when Charlie leaves.

I started to think about my decision as I made my way towards Seth's house.

'What had I been thinking? I mean I like Seth but that meant Leah would be their.' Deciding I would just suck it up I continued on my way.

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Don't worry I'm going somewhere with this but it'll take some time (I think) for it to take play. Please keep reading.

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	8. Chapter 8

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I'm so sad only two reviews. Yet I will still update. Oh and this is where things get off track from _Breaking Dawn_

Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns _Twilight_

Bella's point of view

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Past Love

Chapter 8: A broken dream

"Betrayal can only happen if you love." John Le Carre 

'...I don't want to do this anymore...' I continued to stare at the application. Why did Edward decide to disappear this weekend? He's what keeps me sane.

As I continued to stare at the application, I could hear the clock ticking as the seconds went by. They seemed to be taunting me and all I wanted to do was smash the bloody thing into pieces.

'Where is he? He loves the weekends. We have all morning to ourselves.'

I threw the application to the floor, sensing it was taunting me.

"He always does this to me! He makes a deal and then changes it once I've agreed."

I continued to glare at the college application. He changed our deal once I felt secure and knew my humanity would be ending soon. Our marriage would still occur as planed but after an eventless honeymoon, Edward going as far as to get us different suites, we would return and I would begin school that fall semester.

I had cried and begged but he hadn't faltered. My change would occur when the time seemed right. I knew that would be never. My humanity was precious to him. I felt as it was only my blood that was precious.

I felt my vision become blurry with my tears.

'**Edward, is losing interest in you and quickly. What will happen when someone captures his heart and not only because of their blood. What if they have everything that you don't: grace, beauty, and that air of social etiquette you see and want?'**

"Shut Up!" I growled as I curled up in my sheets. My mind was cruel and I knew were I was most vulnerable.

I found my eyes becoming tired and darkness consuming me.

_I felt my self moving. Once my vision cleared and I found my feet moving headed to a destination and no plans of changing that in sight. My body moving on its own, making its way through the dense forest. _

_My body stopped under a tree, I felt myself put my hands to the bark and my head tilt to the side, to peek out to the meadow visible near the tree._

'_This is the meadow were Edward took me. Where he showed me what the sun did to him. It seems to be sunset now.' my mind rambled and reminisced on the past._

_The small amount of sunlight gave the meadow a heavenly glow. While the ominous darkness from the forest made it seem like an escape. _

_I longed to escape as well, from the shadows of the tree I was under. Yet my body stayed and I found my self turning my head. My heart soared as I saw Edward gracefully stride into the meadow. Halfway towards the middle he halted his steps. His face is full of indifference. Yet concern floating around him._

_I followed his gaze and saw something that was not there._

_A little girl, of maybe three years old, playing amongst the flowers. Honey brown locks that curled at the bottom, glowing in the warmth of the remaining sunlight. She spots Edward, drops her flowers and sprints toward him. All the while she lets out one shout._

"_Daddy!" her sweet, twinkling voice rings in the silence. Its beauty only makes me want to recoil even more. _

_Edward quickly kneels down and catches her in a hug. His features seemed shocked but as he faces the girl, his features change once more, a warm smile is now there. Sincerity wraps around their moment. _

_Once they returned to were she played, I'm able to see her face better._

_Creamy skin, rosy cheeks, a smaller version of Edward's delicate nose, beautifully shaped lips, and big violet eyes; all placed on a heavenly heart-shaped face._

_'**Well look at that. Looks like Edward has a child. Don't you see those subtle features, that replicate Edward's, on her face? And look, no trace of plain old, clumsy, and ugly Bella anywhere. That child must have an exquisitely divine mother to have such beauty.'**_

_This time my body let the tears fall. My mind once again pointed out what I denied to myself and it lashed out full force with all intent to cut me. It succeeded. _

_An ominous laugh filled my head and my heart with fear._

'_**This must be the reason why he won't touch you and make you truly his. A child from you must be like a curse more.'**_

_I felt adrenaline rush through my blood, an insane buzzing drowning out everything. _

'_This can't be happening! His love doesn't belong to anybody else...This child is not his' Doubt clearly filled my head._

_My body no longer could withstand the stress and I fell to my knees. Sobs racked my body but I was invisible and Edward stayed in the heavenly meadow._

_That hideous laugh and darkness surrounded me._

**_'Oh but this is truth love…'_**

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Yay finished! I know it's about time. What can I say…school? Yeah…Lets go with that. Please review so I update faster!

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